All Over The World

I've got friends, and weekends like this I'm lucky to know
they've all come here to reside in the city of the Angels
to chuck their unhealthy ways to work to work and fucking live
I've just got to get out more....

So we get to see each other, like no time has passed
but I have no idea who your day to day friends are
but it doesn't matter because we all come together anyway
and your friend gives me the key to their mansions,
their summer houses
And your new girlfriend feeds me endless supply of Brazillian potato salad
and I invite you old friend into my home, then to my summer house and back
into my new house in a strange world of focused music and work.
I just need to get out more...

And she's sober now, god, we used to party for years and years and years
and she's doing good, and I watch her and sit on her bad as she packs
she seems somehow sad.
I remind her it's so good, she's doing good, and she smiles yes
We've just got to get out more....

scenic moments when things are pleasant and happy
its all state of mind little kiddies
when the guitar was played long enough today
maybe I'm learning it has nothing to do with the keys
and everything to do with the strings
that soothes the angry empty soul
that's not yet travelling the world
that yearns and needs and begs and pleads
and hopes and prays and then bleeds
If only it were truly bleeding then there would really
be a reason for such an angry season.
grow up stupid child ignorant bitter woman
and lick the tasty freedom that's resting on your lips
lightly brushing your hips like a dance or a glass of wine
and be strong in what you do dumbass.

Space and Room

I guess I should have known
I know I did
I have been slowing down, and trying not be be impatient
or take it personal
it's not personal
just personal style
and I'm too much go go go go go go for some

it does make me sad and is a little disheartening
but the pull has been to go it alone
though that's not necessary here
it definitely feels like it
in some ways

or maybe it's just easier that way
pulling away everyday
creating division
i give you room
you give me space
the closeness disappears
and then change

but alas change is good
and I think I'll be happier this way
I'll give you space
and I'll get my own room

Like Before

I guess I imagined it different... I guess I imagined it like before
and I had all these preconceived notions of how it should be
like it was before

and then I read back, and find it weird how so many things i wanted
and predicted are here, here and now, how weird

and then I realize it's all right here
it's all written here
those old songs
like old ripped off doors
i'm stupid this way
suckled down by my own neurotic neurosis

but I wanted collaboration
I guess I expected there to be more
this time, like before
but I'm open to change
and flexible for what is to come
and I'm reminded and comforted that it's all right here
It's all been written right here

so I guess that's what I have got to do.
we've got what we've started too
and what is written here
is all right here
and it's kind of like I pictured it
I guess I knew
it's different from before
even though I kinda prepared for it
planned it, and foreshadowed it
I guess I knew it wasn't going to be like before....

Sobriety and Compromise

I know how much I can compromise
I know how much I've done it before
I know some is required to make it work...to get what I want, need, love

I don't care to be sober today
Though I know it's probably better that way

Want a beer, a coors light, "sweetheart?"
No, I think I'll just go and sit on the porch.

Some simple Glendale townhouse, at least it's green here
and unlike the cactii laden streets where I live

I don't want to be sober today
Though, I think I am happier this way
I am slightly hungover anyway

Yesterday was another day
She and I drunk by the pool all day
on a fucking Wednesday
under the Hollywood sign in the hills somewhere

Foreign boys in briefs, feeding on cocaine
at least she's not married, pregnant or employed
"I want to be a porn star," she says
"Jump on my back," I say
We piggy back down the hill this way.

Today is another day, he says, "Let's spend the day"
"Not fighting" we say, but I'm unhappy and annoyed just the same
I love him as he fixes his friend's bed upstairs

I'm thinking about the songs we play
and the unfinished ones in my head

We build each other up, it's the compromise I dread.

Talking about my lesbian lovers and friends
man daters disguised as man haters
these are our lover's words anyway
He loves her too, I can hear it in his voice, see it in his face
If only she'd love him the same way.

ugly and angry

for several days now and only myself to blame

how are you going to live without all your comforts

i didn't own it before

own the dream, the desire the spirit fingers

4 months not 2 the day

so not wanting to come home

and dealing with the inadequacies that are placed by my mind

but the work that is taking place 

is that of strengthening and changing livid comfort patterns

that breed ugly and angry

i'm not labeling everything mine

that's just ridiculous

if you must live in the apocalypse house

or the calypso house

or the platinum house

it's the glamour house

with keys and key and keys and keys

that breed eternally pretty

In this empty room

one, two, three, babies at your door

and when he lets you down

you know where you can go

you know where to find me

shiny black my hair-do

walking in the cemetery at dusk, song trails in my thoughts

I'm going to set up my music studio here, in this empty room

visions of apocalypse and dust,  tonight again I'm gonna put on my makeup, belts and boots 

while you sing lullabies in your baby's room

while the other children at your feet scurry to the play room

visions of sunflowers wither and bloom miles between us

smiling thinking of days beyond us

and who knows what is to come

so your belly grows, how many more babies at your door?

do you know I will be here when he goes?

waiting for you dancing in my tall black boots

I will be the one to save you

Still dancing alone in this empty room

compliments

nobody knows what the words mean

and he's suffered at the hands of women

and I won't suck it up at the heals of idiotic men.

i will ignore it. you can bet.  i will forever ignore the idiodicies, I fucking hate chauvanistic comments syrupy and sugary sweet from your friends gate.